Monday, November 18, 2013

Blog Challenge Day 18 - A Photograph of Yourself





This is me back in the summer of 2010.

I wore a bikini to the beach that year. It was the first time I wore a bikini since I was like 12.

I mentioned I gained a lot of weight in high school and then I lost it all in my early 20s. And while I changed my life and I looked great, I still didn't have the confidence in myself. I always noticed my flaws. My poochy tummy or my flabby arms or my gummy grin with gapped teeth. I never felt truly skinny despite being around 115 lbs. I had low self-esteem. Rob helped my gain my confidence. He loved me for who I was and said I was beautiful. And slowly I began to love my body as well.

Moving forward a few years, we were heading to the beach for the weekend and I knew we were going to be staying at a relatively quiet beach, so I thought that it was about time to celebrate my body and wear a bikini! And yes, you could still see my poochy tummy, but I didn't really care because truthfully, no one else probably cared either.  I felt like not only was I exposing more skin, but more of myself as well. I was so proud of myself though!

I may not get my bikini body again, but you can be sure that I love my body more than ever. And I'll have my bad days, but I have to remind myself that for 9 months I grew a baby and then my body fed and cared for a baby and if that took a long time, getting back to my normal weight and body will take a long time as well.

2 comments:

Dena Joan said...

This brought tears to my eyes. Your journey reminds me so much of my own that it's uncanny. Seriously. I remember the first time that I wore a bikini to the beach. Oh my goodness. The emotions. Life is such a trip. Glad I have friends like you to get through it with. You are so beautiful, always.

Suzy said...

Oh stop!! Ha ha; )
It makes me happy too to have someone understand and know what I've gone through.

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